You can download the English and Japanese scripts from the attachments at the bottom of this page;
http://sites.google.com/site/tokimemogs1/translation-checking-guide
and report the errors using the format in that page, or you can just write down what you found.
For example;
miruki said...
Also, when talking to Kei about why he models, there's a broken line break. You see the @@ but the text stays in that line and goes off screen.
(Note: @@ is a code for line break. I'll try to write a program to double check that it is placed correctly in the scripts later. ^_^" - Jewel)
I should've mentioned it yesterday but I got kinda carried away with something. One of the mail messages that arrives on the protagonist's email from Chiharu came up as follows:
ReplyDelete" How is everything over there? Is there any changes since I've left. I have been doing OK somehow.
Today was the first day of the class. As dad told me, all the classmates were wearing "GAKURAN" and they just looks like troops so I've got little nervus they all wondered about me, looking the Japanese face and listening to my terrible Japanese. However they must be very kind to me... I guess.
Dad, I am appreciated to your understanding of my decision, living in Japan by myself. Thank you.
Mom, please don't worry about me. I will be OK as well.
Mari, please recognize yourself as an adult. Do your things like your age and try not to bother dad and mom.
I will be writing to you soon
Sincerely
Chiharu "
It has so many grammar mistakes that I don't really understand what was supposed to be said to begin with. This was sometime in like somewhere in between October - December. I kinda forgot to also take note of when exactly it arrived.
Forgot to also mention that on the 7th month of year one around the 22nd or 21st I went on a date to the beach with Hazuki Kei and I was wearing a bathing suit he didn't like and he said, "No appealing at all." I would think that line would've been, "Not appealing at all" or something to that effect.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm just a little picky, but during the sports festival, Himuro says:
ReplyDelete"I just come in place of an absent teacher. Hurry up and give me your hands."
It sounds better taking out the 'just' and maybe turning the 'I' into 'I've'.
That aside, everything is looking wonderful!
Not sure if anyone mentioned it yet, but when the guy comments on your clothing, I'm pretty sure it should be 'clothes' and not 'cloths'.
ReplyDeleteFor example, if you wear clothes that aren't warm enough, Kei would go:
"That cloth... You intentionally wore it?"
I'm pretty sure it should be, "Those clothes..." instead. >: .
Cloth is the raw material, while clothes are the finished product. @__@'.
AG(EHR)(HB@#(*G!*(@GH!. Sorry for double posting. ;--;.
ReplyDeleteBlogspot should add an edit button or something. D: .
That phrase should be this instead:
"Those clothes... You intentionally wore them?"
shouldn't it also be "wear" instead of "wore" since she's still wearing them as he talks to her...?
ReplyDeleteJewel, I'm somewhat on hiatus, spent the weekend moving to my new flat and it's all chaos here, so gimme a week for things to settle down!
Oh yeah, haha. My bad. xD; I guess it would be this then:
ReplyDelete"Those clothes... Did you intentionally wear them?"
Not good to be staying up so late OTL.
....I dun wanna be stingy or anything, lol.. but "did + wear" doesn't that imply she's no longer waering them again? XD
ReplyDelete"Those clothes... do you intentionally wear them?" sounds more right to me.. tho I'd rather make it "are you intentionally wearing them?" Hah.. I don't know. Kei talks weirdly, in general. At least that's what I think... ;D
Re: The Color Pencil Colorist
ReplyDeleteThat is the email from Chiharu. You got it when you went shopping for 6 or 8 times. (Can't remember exact number.) And that English part is the original script from Konami. (His character is an American student studying abroad in Japan so the first email you got from him was in English as he mistook your email for his dad's.)
For other parts, everyone can post the corrections here and I'll fix them before the next patch release.
ReplyDelete(Almost all of the translated scripts in the current patch are my translations and I've said before that my English isn't really good. That's why we need editors. ^_^")
When you see Kijyo on your way home after school and you're given the options to walk home or go to coffee shop or go home alone, if your love with Kijyo is high enough and you pick the coffee shop Kijyo says,
ReplyDelete"Oh? Can't it be that ya start to have some feelings for me? Great. I'll go. I'll go."
The first line should be something like 'Can it be that you're starting to have feelings for me?' unless its just that his accent is kansai ben which makes things different @_@
This one's a real long post since there's alot right at the start of the 3rd year.
ReplyDeleteMr Himuro's speech about being the classes homeroom teacher and how this might be the 3rd year some people have had him as a homeroom teacher he says:
"I want you to think carefully about what you must do to achieve you goal."
The second 'you' should be 'your.'
Later at the end of his speech the main character thinks:
"(I have Mr Himuro123456 as my homeroom teacher all these 3 years)"
It should really be, "I've had Mr Himuro123456 as my homeroom teacher these past 3 years."
Afterwards, right before you go to talk to Mr Himura about your future plans and you're given the option to either go for a university or go for a job or ask about others, when you ask about others and you pick Arisawa it says:
"ArisawaSan has aimed for a top rated university. She's been studied so hard."
It should be, 'She's been studying so hard.'
and when you pick Konno:
"KonnoSan will go to cooking school. She probably aim to be a nutritionist."
Aim should be aims
If you choose to go for the university Mr Himuro says:
"If you want to pass university's entrance exam you must study really hard"
It should be 'If you want to pass a university's entrance exam you must study really hard."
On a date with Hazuki to the videogame center sometime after that, when Hazuki asked what we want to do the options came up as:
-videogame
-medal game
- *;
That last option didn't have anything there but the *;